STORIES

Pardoned myself

Enikő has a lot youtube lectures and meditations, among these my favorite is the Consciousness. (My second favorite is: the Release of sexual blocks.)

If I do not have any special topic, but I know I need to do self-awareness, to get out of my shadow characteristics, and transfer them to new creative power I always listen to this lecture. Thanks to the releases I faced many of my shadow personalities unconsciously also. In this case I just let the sound-recording to go and I let myself to be driven by my Higher-Self and show me pictures and feel the real feelings opened in my Wild-Self.
On higher vibration level the intuition tells me – even if I do not have special topic – what those shadow characteristics I need to work with by my Higher-Self on that moment.

 “Mercy” – I needed almost one year to feel what this word really means what the energy of it and what is behind of it.

One year ago Boglárka asked me: “Do you mercy yourself sometimes?”

 “Meeee? I even don’t know what it is” – I replied.

Have mercy on you sometimes – asked me but I didn’t understand what she was talking about it.

Thinking back to the years behind me I really haven’t known what mercy meant. My mind always was very busy. If I wasn’t thinking about something I scarified my body in different way: professional level of sport (result of it: arthritis, steady tiredness), diet (with zero result) and also I was maximalist to fulfill other’s requirements. I needed to be busy all the time no matter what I did I just did something. If there wasn’t anything to do, nothing to think my life was stopped and I was bored – I couldn’t find my place. I don’t know what the reason of it was or even it was good for something but that was how I lived.

One day in the morning I listened the meditation “Consciousness” and my Higher-Self worked on the real meaning of MERCY.

I saw myself as slave hunter acted crazy: I found the runaway slaves and after cruel torture I burned black men at the stake to show my power. I enjoyed their suffering and their death. The root cause of this horror was a man: I was very young lady when I felt in love but my lover left me , so in my sorrow I followed the pattern of my father and started to hunt slaves. I was brutal with them to reduce my heart-pain. I was satisfied and happy when I saw how they suffer. (Now I can see this happened in my current life as well: after love failure I followed my father’s profession. But this time I realized and I changed  afterwards. To be honest it wasn’t conscious decision.)

On deep conscious level by raising my vibration level I stepped back to my previous life and there I connected my young self with the golden string of unconditional love and with redeemed energy of Earth, the magenta. I did the same with the man who left me in that life. I didn’t look at the real root cause of our break, I just let the energy of unconditional love go around us.
Our story ended the same: he left but on the three aspect of universal love: I could forgive him, I could let him go and I could accept his decision. As I didn’t dig myself at the bottom of the root cause I felt sorrow in my heart, but it wasn’t mortal, destructive, vindictive pain. After couple of years when my lovesickness had gone, I met my later husband. We had a very nice life. Though slaves were around us, there wasn’t any cruelty with them!
What I got as life essential from my previous life, it was the enormous power of tenderness in unconditional love what I felt finally!!
I could mercy myself and others from this warm but huge power.

The education of the Divine Self-Awareness has been started in Hungarian language,

if you are interested in English and would like to know more information about it,

please contact Andrea Gilian on the following phone number: +36- 30-183-2391.